It seems like ages ago…
I have seen your “things I want to have above all else”. But it was this Christmas. The OST from the Jim Jarmusch movie “only lovers left alive”. I can still remember the conversation, our conversation…
“Please watch the movie, you will understand the way I feel about you”.
And I did.
You said “You’re the Adam to my Eve. You’re the black and I’m your white. Please remember that”.
And Adam in that movie ordered a gun. And Eve in that movie came and took the gun from his trembling hands. And saved him.
And now I need you. I can’t deal with this alone. There’s no point in knowing there is a light out there if it can’t shed some light in my darkness. I don’t see your love if I know you’re far away. I need it here, near me. All the stories, all my stories that start with the sentence “I need some space” end with a mathematical certainty at me being alone. And empty. And this time I think I won’t have the strength to get up again.
And now, as if amazon is mocking me, the parcel containing the vinyl of the OST just got delivered to my door.
And your birthday is in thirteen days.
And I have no idea what to do.